"I want to read what I want." Ever feel like this? I do!
Every day, as a public high school librarian, I feel like I need to read as many YA books as possible so that I can make recommendations to my students. Great books languish on the shelves if I can't talk kids into reading them, and I have a hard time talking them up if I haven't read them. So, even though I do make decisions of what to read within this category, I often feel like I "have" to read books that I'd really rather not read.
In addition, I am in two book clubs. Every month that means I "have" to read two books that may or may not ones I would have selected otherwise. This doesn't mean that I don't enjoy most of them. As soon as someone says I have to read book, a part of me turns all teenager inside and I drag my feet about reading it. It must be some psychological phenomenon---as soon as the words "have to" are spoken, I feel the opposite. Ha!
With these feelings of wanting to read what I want to read swirling around in my head I dropped by the public library to pick up a book I placed on hold for book club next month. As I walked in
I stopped off to browse the rack of new books. I ended up walking out with four books I had no idea I wanted to read until just that moment:
- I Could Chew on This: and Other Poems by Dogs by Francesco Marciuliano
- How to Teach Your Children Shakespeare by Ken Ludwig
- Fantastic Mistakes: Neil Gaiman's 'Make Great Art' Speech
- The Maid' Version by Daniel Woodrell (this is the book I went for)
Now, to be honest, I probably won't read all three of these extra books, but it felt like an act of defiance just checking them out. My-my, so pathetic, huh?
Am I the only person who experiences these feelings of wanting to read what I want to read and then feeling defiant when I do select them?