My Head Is Full of Books: TTT: Humorous Opening Lines

"Outside a dog a book is man's best friend, inside a dog it is too dark to read!" -Groucho Marx========="The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid." -Jane Austen========="I don’t believe in the kind of magic in my books. But I do believe something very magical can happen when you read a good book."-JK Rowling========"I spend a lot of time reading." -Bill Gates=========“Ahhh. Bed, book, kitten, sandwich. All one needed in life, really.” -Jacqueline Kelly=========

Monday, May 25, 2020

TTT: Humorous Opening Lines

Top Ten Tuesday:

Funny or humorous opening lines to favorite books

“A green hunting cap squeezed the top of the fleshy balloon of a head.”

–A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole

“Going to Ford’s Theatre to watch the play is like going to Hooters for the food.”

–Assassination Vacation by Sarah Vowell

“I write this sitting in the kitchen sink.”

–I Capture the Castle by Dodie Smith

“We went to the moon to have fun, but the moon turned out to completely suck.”

–Feed by M.T. Anderson

"The sun did not shine, it was too wet to play, so we sat in the house on that cold, cold wet day."

-The Cat in the Hat by Dr. Seuss

“The human head is of the same approximate size and weight as a roaster chicken. I have never before had the occasion to make the comparison, for never before today have I seen a head in a roasting pan.” –Stiff by Mary Roach

“I may have found a solution to the Wife Problem.”

–The Rosie Project by Graeme Simsion

“All of this happened, more or less.”

–Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut

“I’m pretty much f*cked.”

–The Martian by Andy Weir

“There was a boy called Eustace Clarence Scrubb, and he almost deserved it.”

-The Voyage of the Dawn Treader by C.S. Lewis

“In our family, there was no clear line between religion and fly-fishing.”

-A River Runs Through It by Norman MacLean

“The story so far: In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.”

-The Restaurant at the End of the Universe by Douglas Adams

"Long ago, when I was a junior high student in Iowa, I remember being taught by a biology teacher that all the chemicals that make up the human body could be bought at a hardware store for $5.00 or something like that."

-The Body: A Guide to the Occupants by Bill Bryson

“Mr. and Mrs. Dursley of number 4, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much.”

-Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone by J.K. Rowling

[Top Ten Tuesday is hosted by Artsy Reader Girl.]

-Anne